Can You Help Me Find My Dream Guy?

Most of you know I am single, and if you didn’t know – I am single. I have lots of Facebook friends who are young college students and my newsfeed has been full of engagement notifications. Also, my niece has been talking about the list of qualifications she has for her potential mate, and I realized that I have no list. I am completely unprepared for another man to walk into my life. I don’t like to be unprepared, so I have considered and am presenting a list of qualifications for my ideal man.

1.     No Duck Dynasty beards. None. To be clear though, I am okay with facial hair. In fact, I love well-trimmed mustaches and beards, but I don’t understand the fascination with having a bush on your face. So yeah, no big, bushy beards.

2.     He should wear flannel shirts, and be okay with me borrowing them. In fact, he should be okay with me borrowing ANY of his shirts and should NOT complain when they smell like perfume.

3.     It would be better if he doesn’t like coffee very much – this way I don’t have to share and we don’t have to buy our own coffee plantation.

4.     NCIS should be acceptable with occasional NCIS marathons. If this is not acceptable, he can expect to be Gibb slapped.

5.     He should be able to tolerate Skillet. I am not asking him to like Skillet—that would be nice but we have to keep the qualifications reasonable. Still, every now and then he may come home and Comatose or Awake and Alive will be blasting from the kitchen. He should be okay with this. And the honest truth is: if he can handle Skillet, he will probably be okay with the other music I listen to.

6.     I like movies where Bruce Willis or Denzel Washington are using guns, and movies where Pierce Brosnan may be singing, and movies where Colin Firth looks dashing in a tuxedo. He should also be okay will all of this.

7.     Seriously - the toilet seat must be put down. Falling into the toilet in the middle of the night could result in death, or at least, serious injury – for him.

 This is, obviously, not an exhaustive list but I think it gives me a good starting point without resorting to cliché standards such as hair color, age, or income. At some future point I may need to add to my list – I mean, we haven’t even talked about The Princess Bride, stuffed animals, or the topic of laundry. Overall though, I feel so much more prepared!

So, do you know anyone who meets these qualifications? Interested applicants should go to www.mysonisamarine.com! Hahaha!